Dear Sir/Madam
I would like to apply for the position of Four Year Old Boy. I believe I more than satisfy the essential criteria and bring a wealth of relevant and recent experience as a Three Year Old to equip me for this position.
1. I can fall down and smile. I sometimes fall down just for fun.
2. I don't mind getting knocked about. I sometimes knock others about but not if they yell at me to stop or thump me on the arm. I leave those ones alone.
3. I can jump off tall things. I am getting very good at learning to wait my turn to jump off tall things.
4. I am easily amused. As long as toileting words are involved, I'm good to go.
5. I like pirates, jelly beans, ugly, menacing toys, going fast, tumbling, hide and seek, and my Dad. I can show you how old I am on my fingers. I am an excellent cuddler and back patter.
Sir/Madam, I am the quintessential Four Year Old and I'm willing to undertake whatever skullduggery is required. Especially if squirting water is involved.
Yours hopefully
Geronimo
P.S. Mum said I had to withdraw my application until I eat all my pumpkin. I'll be in touch in a few years.
